The Teen Appeal

Giving truth to Memphis youth

Learning and understanding the new language of love


By Alexis G. Ditaway

Ridgeway High School

Relationships are complicated things, especially during high school years. While some common practices remain the same throughout the years, much has changed from freshman year. One noticeable change is the “language of love” used.

From distinguishing if you and your significant other are “talking” or “go together,” to determining if you are the “main chick,” “side chick,” or “community man,” these terms can leave one confused.

“If somebody says, ‘Yeah, we talk,’ it’s like we’re not serious, and we’re not playing. But at any given moment, it can be over,” said Ivan Fluker, a homeschooled senior. “It’s somewhat in-between.”

Jeremy Roach, a student at Southwest Tennessee Community College gave his perspective.

“Talking can be different things. You’re getting to know that person and seeing if you can see myself with them, because both of you are trying to further the relationship,” Roach said.

The next “step” in the relationship cycle is the phrase, “go together;” it means that both people are now exclusive to each other.

“It’s like the beginning phase of a relationship, kind of, before you really get called the term ‘boyfriend’ or ‘girlfriend,’” said Morgan Benton, a senior at Ridgeway High School. “You know you care about someone when you don’t say ‘go together;’ you say ‘in a relationship’ or ‘that’s my significant other.’”

While the phrases are important, it’s also important to know what role you are playing in the relationship. Notably, there are two main roles: “side chick” and “main chick.”

“Side chick: the girl that I’d keep around in case the main chick is slipping,” said Josh Johnson, a senior at Central High School. She gets most of the benefits of the main chick except recognition and gifts on holidays. Everything works well with that until she becomes ungrateful and begins to have ‘main chick’ mentality.”

Johnson also adds, “A main chick is my girlfriend or soon-to-be. The main girl I talk to. Everyone knows I’m feeling her. We go out, take pictures. Maybe a little ‘cake’ in public. But she’s the girl I really want. Even though she may trip, I still want her around because she is the girl for me. Or at least the girl I want to be for me.”

These are just a few of the terms used by teenagers and young adults to describe relationships and their stages. Many of these are given definitions different from the ones listed here. No matter how you use the words, or if you use them, the language of love is changing, and we should all try to keep up.



One comment on “Learning and understanding the new language of love

  1. Timothy Richmond
    March 12, 2014

    Is this nation wide, international, or is it really just an urban issue?

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This entry was posted on February 4, 2014 by in Uncategorized and tagged , , , , , .


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